Positions, Tips and Tricks: The Sexiest Guide to Spicing Things Up
When relationships first start, the sex is usually electric. However, over time, as the same old routine is carried out time after time, the excitement of sex wanes. In some cases, it can get so bad that it causes the relationship to deteriorate.
Fortunately, there are ways to get a relationship out of a sexual rut and bring that spark back to the bedroom. Need help spicing things up? If so, read on.
Here are some positions, tips, and tricks to follow to spice up your sex life.
Try New Positions
One of the big mistakes that couples tend to make in the bedroom is failing to ever try new positions. Many couples stick to missionary, cowgirl, and maybe doggy style, performing these positions exclusively for years. Naturally, like all activities that are run into the ground, these familiar sex positions start to become boring.
This is why you have to try new sex positions from time to time. Simply altering the positions of your bodies can bring a whole new level of excitement to the act, releasing loads of oxytocin.
Need help learning new sex positions? There are detailed instructions all over the internet. You shouldn’t have much trouble throwing them into your sexy time.
Alter the Dynamic
A great way for you and your partner to break out of your usual sexual routine is by altering the dynamic. For instance, if you are normally the submissive one in the bedroom, you could try being the dominant one for once.
This doesn’t mean that you have to engage in extreme BDSM. It just means taking the initiative instead of letting your partner do so.
Initiate the sex. Initiate position changes. Initiate foreplay.
This sudden change in sexual behavior could pleasantly surprise your partner, bringing your sex to a level that it has not yet reached. Or… it could do the opposite. However, you should, at the very least, try.
Bring Toys Into the Bedroom
Another of the many ways to spice it up in the bedroom is to bring some toys. These days, there are sex toys of all kinds available, from dildos to vibrators to sex swings and much, much more.
These toys can bring a lot of novelty to the bedroom, providing new sensations and supplying feelings that have never been felt before.
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A big reason that bedrooms grow cold is that partners are unable to express their sexual fantasies to each other. This leads to repressed and, ultimately, unfilling sex.
You absolutely need to discuss your fetishes, fantasies, and preferences with your partner. If you don’t feel comfortable speaking about these things face to face, you could try writing them down on pieces of paper and letting each other read them separately.
If you feel embarrassed or ashamed of your fantasies, start by expressing the tamest ones first. Then, build your way up until you’ve expressed the most intense of your fantasies.
Explore New Locations
Having sex in a bed isn’t a bad thing. However, if it’s done over and over again without any change-up, it can get a little stale. This is why you and your partner should try having sex in different locations.
Try it in the shower, on the couch, in the kitchen, or any other place in which you’ve never tried it before.
If you really want to go far with it, you might even try having sex outside. However, if you’re going to do this, we advise you to be cognizant of public sex laws in your area.
Sex without foreplay is barely sex at all. If there’s no buildup, there’s no emotion involved. And if there’s no emotion involved, you’d might as well just be having sex with an inflatable doll.
While physical foreplay is good, it’s not the only type of foreplay at your disposal. Sexting, day-long dirty talk, and suggestive looks are all great ways to warm your partner up to a sexual experience.
A good deal of sex is psychological. This is why so many of us like to experiment with roleplay during sex. It alters our psyches in a way that induces a new form of excitement.
You and your partner may or may not be into roleplay. But the only way to know for sure is to try it out and see what happens.
Take Advantage of Pornography
They say pornography is unrealistic, and, to an extent, it definitely is. However, many couples successfully use pornography to enhance the sex that they have with each other.
Pornography is useful for a couple of reasons. For one, it can quite simply work as an arousal device, getting you both worked up for each other.
Secondly, it can help you both communicate your fantasies to one another. For instance, if you see something in a video that you would like to try, you can easily bring it up to your partner. There doesn’t have to be an awkward conversation about it because it’s already happening in front of both of you.
Communicate By Asking Questions
One of the biggest mistakes sexual partners make when having sex with one another is failing to ask questions about what the other likes, or what makes the other feel good. Just because you understand the basic anatomy of your partner doesn’t necessarily mean that you understand what makes them tick sexually.
As you’re performing a sexual act on your partner, ask your partner if it feels good. Gauge their moans or tone of voice to determine what is and isn’t working.
Start Spicing Things Up with Sex Toys
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