What Do Guys Like During Sex: A Cheat Sheet to Mastering the Action Under the Sheets

November 6, 2019 Sex Tips
what do guys like during sex

Some say men are from Mars and women are from Venus. However, the differences between men and women don’t make them impossible to understand. In fact, you might be surprised by the simplicity of the things men like during sex.

Studies have shown that couples who have sex once a week are happiest. But it’s not all about quantity — the quality counts too. If you want to boost the quality of your sexy moments with your main man (or any man), this guide is for you.

What do guys like during sex? It’s time to take off the mask and reveal a man’s true desires — keep reading for the answers you crave.

1. Playfulness

There’s a time for deep, serious lovemaking. But many men just want a little more fun and playfulness to come into the bedroom. Or maybe the kitchen would be more fun?

Playfulness during sex can take many different forms. It doesn’t mean you have to try crazy outfits or play with whipped cream (although if you think it would be fun, try it!). A good way to get started is to simply try taking the event a little less seriously.

Let’s face it: awkward stuff sometimes happens during sex. There might be a weird noise or an unflattering angle. If you can laugh, it’s much sexier. Start small and watch your sexy playfulness grow from there.

2. Initiation

Common stereotypes hold that men always want sex, while women are constantly finding excuses to avoid it. However, these stereotypes aren’t true, and they can be toxic in your sex life.

Society might expect men to always initiate sex. But if you allow that to be the case, your sex life can start to seem lackluster. When one person always has to get things going, they’ll eventually reach a point where their heart’s not really in it. Simply initiating sex when you can will make most men very happy.

3. Action

No matter who started it, it’s also important that you stay active once you’re getting it on.

If you were having sex with a man, but he didn’t really move or make a sound, you’d probably wonder if you were doing something wrong. Men often feel the same way. Being an active participant helps show him what you like — and what you don’t.

For some people, it’s more natural to enjoy sex in stillness and quiet. But if your partner isn’t that way, try to add some vocalizing and movement for his sake. Show extra enthusiasm when he does something you like, to make sure he keeps doing it.

If you’re not as into something, your lack of reaction might be enough to get him to change. But if that doesn’t work, using your voice will.

4. Constructive Criticism

This brings us to our next point: how do you effectively tell someone when you don’t like that move or position?

The worst thing you can do is never speak up at all when you don’t like something. This prevents you from enjoying yourself and sets a bad precedent. However, men prefer to get criticism in certain ways.

Negative feedback should come in a constructive, positive way. Otherwise, you might discourage him or make him feel bad. Instead of saying “I don’t like that,” you could try a request (“Will you lick me here instead?”). You can also take control and physically reposition yourself or him to get what you want.

Of course, if he’s not listening, you might need to get more straightforward. But trying to keep things more positive and encouraging tends to get better results for both of you. If there are any serious hard lines or preferences that need to be discussed, make sure to talk about them during a non-sexual time so you can get your point across effectively.

5. Consent

The discussion of getting consent often puts all the pressure on men. However, it’s just as important for a woman to get consent from a partner at the appropriate times. This shows men that they’re not the only responsible party, which can help them relax and enjoy themselves.

Consent can be sexy and doesn’t have to interrupt the moment. For example, asking “Can I kiss you?” in a sexy whisper keeps the mood going, while making sure you don’t move forward before the other person’s ready.

6. Confidence

Confidence will help you approach sex in a bolder, more fun, and more comfortable way. Although more confidence is primarily a benefit for you, it’s also something men want. It’s a perfect win-win!

For example, maybe you feel like you shouldn’t get naked with the lights on until you’ve hit the gym for a few months. But this lack of confidence is causing your male partner(s) (and you) to miss out on all the fun things you can try with the lights on.

Working on your confidence doesn’t mean getting that beach body, or buying new lingerie. It’s all about how you feel and how you see yourself. As you learn to feel great about yourself during sex, you’ll find yourself naturally doing things guys love in bed.

7. Climb on Top

Sex can get exhausting when you’re on top all the time. Make sure to switch between positions where he does all the work and ones where you do.

Of course, if one of you is primarily dominant or submissive, this balance might be shifted some. But still, there are ways to be more dominant from the bottom. Make sure sex doesn’t get too physically straining by sharing some of that workload.

What Do Guys Like During Sex? Here’s How to Find Out

Nearly everyone, no matter their sexual preferences, wonders “What do guys like during sex?” at some point.

These tips are a great start. However, since everyone is different, the only surefire way to find out is to have a conversation about it. Not sure how to communicate about sex? Check out this guide to get started.